There’s A Were wolf, and there’s Aware Wolf

To Mary


compliments to Kaz Field’s Blog- HGFields on WordPress. The obnoxious drunk vs a calm high

Within a moment that I’d beg to differ was better late than never I awoke even more to the fact of movement.

I know we’ve all realised it long before, but moving is such a normal, every day, every second habit ( infact we humans are like wild beasts, incapable of keeping completely still for long periods; when I say long periods I mean no eye twitching, no blinking, no eyebrow raising, no body a fucking rock sun ) but tonight while laying on the floor listening to some music I sighed to myself…” to move from here now, let me move my hand first ” and from that, my “will to move” brought my hand above my face.

I stared, I stared into my wonderfully “suited for massage” structured hand as if I unlocked another code.

My thought of movement was enough. Spiritual powers acting on the nervous system sending electronic messages to whichever respective body part required for hauling ass. Granted many things can move, what once was inanimate can now make you look twice. Technology has advanced to an incredible extent, however those advances still need power. They need energy of all kinds. Energies for movement, for processing for pale versions of our true selves; this energy we create ourselves.

We are walking, beautiful creatures powered by our ability to tap into the conscious level of being. Even awareness from little things, whether “early”, “late” or reoccuring come when they are needed.

So let’s all realise the power of our thoughts….one thought can move one finger, and that same thought can move the World.

Happiness my friends ! 😀




Anger’s a Bad Colour on You


Good day Folks ! And what a Wonderful day it is!

First off I’d like to thank my past self last night for knowing when to tap out. Leaving behind the rest of the j for this morning’s pleasure.

So…shall we begin ?

Late one night around 3 am or so…maybe 4, more so 4 a.m ( and I use night because between being lazy and logical, morning is when the sun rises fullstop ) I sat outside of a party watching these two girls quarrel with each other. There were one or two other fights earlier and this was just some silly aftermath. I noticed one of the two women who was notably more livid than the other. Then something happened…then, I stopped seeing them and started to feel them. It was quite a painful feeling, which brings me now to tell you the matter of this blog: Anger.

To look at this we must first appreciate the philosophies of some cultures. In some Cultures, Occults etc we may find beliefs of ( and many other religions do as well )  one guardian angel and internal demons assigned to each person. However, in this onslaught of good vs evil, you can also be attacked by external demons. It even goes a way to say with enough fight, enough attacks from demons feeding on your life force while you submit to feelings such as depression and anger, that the demons begin to possess you.


Another sect, found in occults and the muslim faith are the jinn ( djinn/ genie also derives from this arabic word ). Jinn are thought to make up the three sentient of God along with humans and angels. Records have the jinn and their fall being similar to that of lucifer and his fallen angels in the christian text. The Jinn fell from the heavens and find themselves attached to one human; these jinn will feed on your bad emotions and whisper evil deeds into your ear.

Do you remember the last time you saw someone angry ? What did they look like, did they resemble the person you knew or cared about ( obviously excluding strangers here ). When was the last time you were completely angry ? I mean blood raged, adrenaline rush ready to boot a nigga in the fucking face, saying the worst things you could say to a person. How did that feel ?

Disgusting. You feel disgusted in yourself, what you did, what you said. Filthy. As if you were not you, as if your soul was now tainted by a gooping, black, thick slime. When you see someone you know or love be angry, especially at you they look so different. A fury burns in their eyes like you’ve never seen before and you experience fear, regret, pain and in turn more anger. Who are they then ? Who are you in that moment ? Are you sure that is truly a part of your being ?

The People are so used to pain and loss that I fear we have come to expect it, hope for it. Pain and misery is comfort for many simply because they don’t have faith anymore that they deserve to be happy. We are humans… we ARE supposed to be “too happy”, yes it may not last but pain too must follow the laws of the universe; pain too shall not last. Anger, sorrow, jealousy: do not let these things become you, your soul is as bright and beautiful as the morning sun.

Shine Your Lights Upon The World !

Be Well & Be Happy 🙂



What’s New in the News ?

8081_334745756608033_1116633350_n“Yo SKippa..holla back”


“What’s cookin”

“here watchin lil news”

“oh cool cool anything interesting ?”

“not particularly”

To which I told my fried I relish the day a bajan’s discovery or advancement leads the headlines. Lol was the response I got but this is a serious issue.

Granted we are a small island without resources of bigger countries, it still bothers me the direction we are going in. It seems as if the institutions push you to leave Barbados, the school system, the behaviour of the elders, the structure of the businesses and education. It is as if Barbados’ job is to educate us so we can go overseas to study.

Why is this ?

Why is there not more awareess, involvement, action in pushing manufacturing, agricultural, science even ! medicine.  relevant careers in the island ? So that we as barbadian citizens Want to learn more in Bim, We WANT to pursue a career in our home to make it better.

Yes there are many processes, red tape and care into planning but just because something is as it is, and has been for a long time, does not mean that is how things HAVE to be or will continue to be. The first step is always to realise and ackowledge, the first step is realisation. And one step in the right direction is always better than two steps in the “wrong” direction.


Finally got spurred on to write a post, had some other ideas recently but none to hold me over long enough in writing. I believe one talk I had with Sara was about social media. She isn’t on facebook anymore and I’ve taken certain different takes on it for the last year. My main reason for being on them and abusing for the past year was bcaab but now that that is somewhere taking up space and housing spidermen, I am free.

Take twitter for example, depending on what or who you follow, there is a high chance of always waking up or perusing during the day to see people’s sorrow, pain, anger, every aspect of their life, and it’s often so negative. Same thing for facebook ( those funny pictures are LIFE though ! sometimes ya don’t need a philosophical view, just a good ol fuckin smile and laugh ), so much irrelevant cunt, brainwashing schemes are thrown out there. These things sink deep into our subconscious and affect our energies. Don’t let what you read become you, be mindful of what you take in, especially if you don’t have any concepts of your own subconscious.

Well folks that is it for now, short and sweet ( short for me lol ) but always remember you can find countless and explosive meanings encapsulated within fewer words.

P.S You normally hear people say “oh well that’s life” when something bad happens or a string of undesirable situations. This is a fine example of realising life is not good or bad, it just you react and your attitude towards situations determines your well being and your future force. So if something happens you don’t like, stay calm and don’t say ” oh well that’s life “, find some goodness within your heart ( think of a person who makes you happy, memory anything so ) and say ” Well ! That’s LIFE ! 😀 “…and the change in attitude will wonder your mind at how things could have changed so sweetly so quickly.

What makes you happy ? Multiply that shit fam !

Live Well & Be Happy 🙂


Walk the Plank you lilly livered scum !

295467_334741439941798_1913236686_nDon’t know why I still try to make plans sometimes. Planning, especially for something like this blog is unwise. I believe in between starting the path of a natural way while at the same time seeking knowledge leaves me a bit misconstrued. I’m sure there is a balance though, it will happen…

Greetings folks ! hope you who read this are well, if not I wish wellness sooner rather than later….

Pain. Pain & Suffering, being in spiritual prisons. These are things we cannot escape from. From being birthed into this world we suffer, people will get sick, people will die, objects will be lost, destroyed or cease to function. Things are as they are, but that doesn’t mean something is wrong. Just because things don’t go your way or you find a pattern of disappointment…don’t ever say something is “wrong” with you, say everything is RIGHT with me !

The blog today is motivated by the ending of a short-lived but absolutely wonderful relationship. In these times I must express gratitude because through the pain I am able to train my spirit, elevate myself in love itself. As we grew from teenagers you will find most people are geared by ego. I love you today, hate you tomorrow. Jealousy, envy, negativity..these are not kind things. To feel pain, to feel the sorrow of loss, that is fine, that is okay; those things are a part of you and the path of love, don’t ever think they are BAD or WRONG, don’t lose yourself in the negativity.

The pain at least shows you that you had the capacity to feel an amazing feeling, you had those moments and were able to experience something so wonderful. When you love someone, mean it…if they need help be there, if they need to talk be there, did you not say you love them ? Regardless of if they are with you are not, you love them. However, as zen sex will show you there is always the middle way. Do not disrespect yourself or disadvantage yourself for someone who chooses not to be with you anymore, respect yourself and their decision…find that balance between opening your soul and letting go.


If you think about it on a grander scale, what good is your love if you will refuse those who you feel have done you “wrong” ? Sometimes you’ve got to stop thinking about “why did this happen” or ” why did this happen to me”, you’ve got to be Aware of your ego, of the flesh and strip that from your spirit. Good and bad, right and wrong, these things are cravings of a mind desperate to be logical all of the time. This desperation to be logical is born out of a thirst to understand, a hunger to explain events that occur. But this way, this way only muddles your vision more. Everything always has another side, Always…you will find many plausible reasons for one simple thing, and this way is not being aware. We must learn to be aware of a situation As It Is. We must learn to accept how we feel, how others feel, as things that just are…only then can you begin to be at peace with yourself and move forward holistically.

We are all connected, whether this life is an illusion or not we are here and we are connected. If you hate someone, you feel it because in the end you are hating yourself. If you love someone, if you love till you feel you can’t love anymore ( generally, people, things, animals, etc ) you feel good, because that love is elevating your spirit. So for each disappointment, each pain, each loss, each regret, use that as an opportunity to be at peace with what happened and at peace with yourself; an opportunity to train your spirit.

Now obviously I am no monk, I am no buddhist, I am no spiritual speaker, I am simply another part of us who has chosen to walk a path. Humans are a creature of habit, things do not ever simply just change. Your attitude and thoughts might, but your behaviour takes practice. The same reason monks spend decades meditating, the same way you spend copious amounts of time training for athletics, gym, even keeping a consistent diet. The same way with positive thinking, with opening your heart to love, with walking the middle way. Everyday, every moment is an opportunity to live well, and when you are aware of yourself going off track. STOP. Just STOP. If you are speaking ill, STOP. If you are thinking ill, think nothing. Thinking of these things being easy or hard is irrelevant, what matters is you just do. “Wu Wei”- a chinese principle which means doing without doing, with this I will leave you folks a quote from ZEN SEX ( great book ) and a video.

The Way does not get closer by searching farther.
The sage keeps to the beginning to discover the end.
And finds without seeking;
Arrives without leaving;
Does without doing;
And knows without understanding.

P.S The blog feels all over the place but that is fine, it is as it is, I hope today we can take some thing from this post, and maybe if you read it again tomorrow you’ll see something you didn’t see today 🙂

Be The Vast Space in Which Things Happen

Howdy folks,

Today’s blog was written sometime last week, I will try my best to keep it within 3 paragraphs, each probably being a different, extremely brief topic… but already I feel as if I am lying to you on the estimate.


Coming off a chiefin’ session with the HG Fields himself, my mind was repeatedly fucked by the layout of clubs ( we were in Sugar which is still minimalistic compared to others elsewhere ). Taking into account the positioning of lights, sound, decor, the vibe is essentially a drug itself. Just like the cave men from 30 000+ years ago, we travel through our “caves” of sensory deprivation ( in this case overexposure ). We go out to clubs, under the illusion of something “normal” but as a virtual drug to send our senses in a haphazard way; and they say marijuana is the gateway to drugs…jokes! some of this propaganda has been laughable since my first real hit.

Onto some ramblings that were a constant roundhouse-roadhouse kick to my mind. Imagine the days of old, when the lands were of our dreadlocked, black ancestors. Some drifting in their nomadic groups to colder regions all over, pigment changing, melanin depleting, and adapting to the changes in climate. Eyes, nose, hair, body structure, skills, all to adapt to cold, dense and fluctuating atmospheres. Thousands of years roll on as we have our first “interracial porn”. The culmination of the two species creating the first ethnically black influenced red man ( so I believe ). Strip now, the concept of man being god over animals, and just another “more consciously aware” genus “human”. We can picture evolution, the glowing birth of a red man, uncurling from a ball of energy, standing as tall and confident as our brethren but with noticeably different skin. As we were once all the same, we still are. Miracles everywhere, as is birth, as is drinking tea and eating breakfast.

Thirdly I’ll just leave some quotes I watched from a lecture today, it can be absurdly boring to anyone, I had to put effort in it at first, but it became easier the 2nd time around ( I fell asleep ). I do fancy his delivery though, it kind of encaptulates the message he delivers and what OF he delivers…

“You are not what happens in your life. You are not the situation, the time, the content. You are the space in which things happen. You are not your thoughts, they come and go. You are the vastness of which they travel through”

Well that’s almost verbatim.

Oh yes…before we go, I had a talk with a friend of mine the other night. He was a christian, follower of God and we just had a slight conversation to which at some point he said ” you can’t change what I believe “. This concerned me a bit as I never said or hinted that was my intention, he asked me a question and topics followed based on things I have read, seen and identified with. Another point that bothered me is when I told him what an athiest said, about how reading the bible is the fastest evidence if you think about being athiest. We touched on the laws and how killing was done widespread, the only killing disallowed was within the tribes, which sparked segregation etc. Given the fact the other cities did sin yes, my friend said ” well if they sinned and the punishment for sinning was death, well “…I was astounded at how morals and the search for a deeper understanding was lacking in that splutter of a statement.

Anyways folks, I’m out, and remember, everything is as simple as you don’t make it seem…if you love, love openly, and when you love, let the world know !

In Peace and Harmony



The Sun’ll come up…Tomorrow

bet your bottom dollar that tomorroowwww (8)

Greetings Folks…today’s post comes off the bat of youtube videos I watched last night featuring Neil Degrasse Tyson, a reknowned AstroPhysicist as well as talks with my step-father ( sort of ).

Honestly, actuallly I can’t full remember what I was going to write about at the moment so here’s to hoping I can wing it and publish this today.

Ah yes, this has to do with completing my university degree as well as interest in attending a holistic school next year. Now I am not a fan of UWI, nor have I ever been, based on not having a passion or a fuck to give for the degrees they were teaching ( especially what is taught and how it is taught ). My field, management with psychology, and many others  which help a capitalist economy serve purposes I do admit realitively, however for as long as I have acknowledged my conscious I know it isn’t for me. A career, a job, doing something for part or the rest of my live which has no spiritual benefit for me or people ( as we are one ) is not a path I’d like to walk.

As I grow I have accepted that I may not be rich, may not have a family, a big house, fancy car and 3 dogs plus 2 parakeets. But what I do know, and what the buddha has stressed on in his teachings, is I want to live WELL. I want to do GOOD. The path that I walk now, this mentality we have been slaves to for centuries shall not bear me fruits of true joy and spiritual uplifting in this life or the many to come. That being said I will finish my exams this semester and attempt to take a leave while I find work to help fund the school next year. When you want something, better get up and go for it, granted I still have an application to fill, an essay to write and an interview for the school, I’m going to “The Pursuit of HappYness” the fuck out of the next year.

Based on Neil Degrasse’s talks with Bill Maher ( to which I will leave a clip below ), I’d like people to wake up and remember their dreams, their beliefs, in a better tomorrow. Not a better materialistic tomorrow, but a better holistic tomorrow. If you are doing something you love or passionate about but can’t have the big bucks like your friends, that’s okay…do you need it? Do you need the fastest car ? Do you need to buy 10 bottles when you go partying ? Do you need the latest in everything ? What do those things do for you in mind body and spirit besides give a temporary satisfaction to which you will forever feel a hunger for, especially in the next 3 months when a new piece of tech comes out or clothing. That being said I love my games so knamean, when a new game comes out, if I got the money I am buying that ish…but that’s a different ball game, just wanted to state that.

Uhhh talks between my step father and I shall be for a later date though. But basically he is a hebrew israelite by religion so our talks always circle around the bible and the original scriptures void of centuries of interpretations with an agenda. To be truthful his teachings to me are the only things which make me believe in the god of Israel, of Jacob, Abraham etc etc based on prophecies in the bible. Based on us as black people and by extension as people of a whole, what is being done wrong, what’s reflected in the modern wars and global conflict as well as the interruptions by natural disasters. Great talks man, worth a listen… anyways…

Go in peace and prosperity, don’t let anyone discourage you from following the god within which guides you to your happiness and fulfillment.


And so it begins… again

Greetings to the few and far between

I’ve already been blogging on wordpress under a different name, however I am dying off on that one. Whether this be another phase of mine which I can’t seem to keep up with is uncertain. One thing I am sure of though, is the annoyance I am trying to quell after having to create a new gmail account, some things just take too long; between being lazy and simple I have a hard time sticking to some things.

Recently I’ve read a blog, well as recent as 30 minutes ago, of one of my friends. He is a graduate of UWI whose focus lies on many topics, but interestingly enough I dig hearing his views on economics, globalization, the caribbean, etc.. anything of that stimulation. That’s enough of that, now to finish up this short post of which I’m not sure of sequels.

My other blog focused on event reviews in  my home country. Not withstanding my laziness I’ve gotten quite bored of that life for now. I believe it has to do with my lack of funds. Hanging around people who are on different wave lengths gets tiring after a while. So as much as I love to hear about how many bottles someone bought or how many women they grabbed at in a party, I’m on another quest which I’ve been following quite feverently lately.

For now let’s just stick to generic Peace. Whether I am lazy, uninterested or too simple sometimes, I just wonder a lot about mankind and it’s history. A history plagued in greed and war, what really can become of this cycle ? Just of the cycle in life and death, reincarnations and karmic harmony, would it be right to admire the buddha who sought to, and only he now knows if he did, transcended the cycle itself rather than just adjust his karmic reality for his next lifetime. Granted he did say, just like other messiah’s and men of praise that they will stay or come again, based on their feeling of duty to help others elevate. Regardless of that fact I will instead simply make a note about something I got quite perturbed by last night…

It hurt a bit, as a man, as a black man, a caribbean man, that I grew up without my gods. I grew up with christian gods, with jesus christ, but what about my cultural gods ? What about these caribbean gods derived from african descent whom I don’t even know. Taking away the diefication, what’s really important is that I, we have grown without our caribbean culture passed on through these gods. At 21 years old I’m now starting the journey as a newborn, and perhaps a newborn I shall be for quite some time, if not in every situation.

As abruptly as premature ejaculation happens, I will end here, maybe you will see me again, maybe you won’t, if you’ve read this then I wish at least you see yourself.

Namaste my brothers and sisters